Who Am I ?
The Bible declares in Psalms 139:13-16 GW:
“You alone created my inner being. You knitted me together inside my mother. I will give thanks to you because I have been so amazingly and miraculously made. Your works are miraculous, and my soul is fully aware of this. My bones were not hidden from you when I was being made in secret, when I was being skillfully woven in an underground workshop. Your eyes saw me when I was still an unborn child. Every day ⌞of my life⌟ was recorded in your book before one of them had taken place.”
Could you imagine that it took me 27 years to appreciate my dark skin, long hair, and glasses? Well, it did. Growing up, I always knew I was different from the other girls around me. I was somewhat "sheltered," as my mom didn't allow certain things, and for that, I appreciate her. I wasn't the prettiest growing up, and I suffered from severe acne from middle school to high school. My insecurities and low self-esteem stemmed from being told I wasn't pretty compared to the other girls, who had lighter complexions, clear skin, and nearly perfect teeth. Kids can be cruel, and I experienced their harshness firsthand. I was either the teacher's pet or considered ugly. My nickname was "speed bump"—a name I remember to this day, and it hurt the most.
I didn't like my name either. Welexi, pronounced as Wa-Lex-C, didn't have any special meaning like the names of the other kids. It was something my mother made up. “Black parents often love to give their children unique names that make them stand out from the crowd." During a prayer call, one of the young ladies asked us the meaning of our names. Everyone started flooding the chat box with the meanings of their names. But I didn’t. I didn’t know the meaning behind Welexi Renee Harris. I felt a bit embarrassed, so I asked my mom. She told me she named me after my dad, Wesley Harris.
In that moment, I began researching my name, breaking it down to see what I could discover. This journey led me to understand that my name, though unique, was a blend of love and family heritage. It represented my father's legacy and my mother's creativity. As I delved deeper, I realized that the uniqueness of my name mirrored the uniqueness of my own identity. This revelation was a turning point. I started to see my dark skin, long hair, and glasses not as flaws but as distinctive features that told my story. Embracing these aspects of myself became a powerful act of self-love. I learned that beauty comes in many forms and that my worth wasn't defined by conventional standards. My journey to self-acceptance wasn't easy, but it was deeply transformative.
Psalms 139:13-16, has always held a special place in my heart. It serves as a beautiful reminder that every aspect of my being was intentionally and lovingly crafted by God. Despite the years I spent struggling with self-acceptance, these words reassured me that I am fearfully and wonderfully made. They became a source of comfort and strength, reinforcing the idea that my uniqueness was not a mistake but a divine design.
